Divorce Checklist: 21 Essential Steps to Save Money, Time, and Stress
A proven divorce checklist turns a stressful process into a clear sequence of actions. This guide shows what to do before filing, how to organize documents, and how to move from negotiation to final order without wasted time or cost.
The steps are grouped into phases with outputs, pro tips, and resource links. Work straight through or jump to the phase you need most. The aim is clarity that prevents delays and keeps your case on track.
To move faster, centralize your materials inside Splitifi Divorce OS. It helps you collect evidence, build a parenting plan, and follow through on orders.
Phase 1. Decide and Prepare: Your Divorce Checklist
Step 1. Clarify goals and nonnegotiables
Write three goals for children, two for housing, and two for finances. Identify what you can trade and what is nonnegotiable. This one page note anchors later decisions.
- Top three parenting goals with reasons
- Housing plan for the next twelve months
- Debt, savings, and stability objectives
Step 2. Safety, privacy, and digital hygiene
Change passwords, enable two factor authentication, separate shared Apple ID or Google accounts, and update device passcodes. If safety is a concern, create a private communication plan with trusted contacts.
Step 3. Build a small support team
List one legal professional, one financial advisor, and one personal support. Decide what to share with each person. Schedule weekly ten minute check ins to keep momentum.
Phase 2. Financial Foundation
Step 4. Inventory assets and debts
Collect statements for checking, savings, retirement, brokerage, HSA, college accounts, mortgage, HELOC, auto loans, student loans, credit cards, and personal loans. Record balances, owners, and last four digits for quick reference.
Use the asset tracker to avoid misses. A complete inventory reduces discovery disputes and helps close mediation faster.
Step 5. Budget, cash flow, and emergency fund
Draft a six month view of income and essential expenses. Identify costs to reduce and subscriptions to cancel. Build a small emergency fund so surprises do not trigger new debt.
Step 6. Credit reports and account logins
Pull free credit reports from each bureau and dispute errors. Update contact information on financial accounts. Create new accounts for separate income and bills if appropriate. Freeze credit if fraud risk is present.
Population and court context resources: U.S. Census Bureau.
Phase 3. Legal Documents and Process
Step 7. Choose process path and counsel
Decide between mediation, collaborative law, or litigation. Interview at least two family law attorneys. Ask about hourly rates, retainers, and limited scope options. For national background, see the American Bar Association and the National Center for State Courts.
Step 8. Gather core legal documents
- Marriage certificate, prenuptial or postnuptial agreements
- Three years of tax returns with W 2 or 1099 forms
- Six to twelve months of bank, credit card, and investment statements
- Pay stubs, benefits summaries, and retirement plan documents
- Property deeds, vehicle titles, loan agreements, and appraisals
- Insurance policies for health, life, auto, and property
Centralize everything in Divorce OS so your attorney spends time on strategy rather than chasing documents.
Step 9. Filing sequence and court requirements
Confirm county fees, parenting classes, and service rules on your court website. Many courts offer e filing that is faster and easier to track. Keep certified copies of orders in one organized folder.
Phase 4. Kids and Support
Step 10. Parenting plan and schedule
Outline legal custody, physical custody, weekly schedule, holidays, travel, and decision rules. Add exchange times, school pickups, and medical notifications. Solid plans reduce conflict and protect children.
Use the parenting plan builder in Divorce OS to produce a clean schedule for mediation.
Step 11. Temporary orders and communication rules
Temporary orders stabilize parenting time, support, and bills during the case. Agree on a communication code. Use concise, neutral messages and document important decisions.
Step 12. Child support preparation
Collect income records and childcare, health, and education costs. Understand how your state applies guidelines. Prepare a reasonable proposal that fits the facts and your child’s best interests.
Phase 5. Property, Retirement, Insurance
Step 13. Home, vehicles, and appraisals
Decide whether to sell, refinance, or buy out. Get market value estimates or an appraisal. List every vehicle, loan balance, and title holder. Photograph property conditions for reference.
Step 14. Retirement accounts and QDRO readiness
Collect plan documents for 401 k, 403 b, pensions, and IRAs. Many plans require a Qualified Domestic Relations Order. Confirm plan procedures so decree language matches. See IRS Publication 504 for federal guidance.
Step 15. Health, life, and property insurance
Confirm who covers the children, adjust beneficiaries, and update address and coverage levels. Review homeowner, renter, and auto policies. Keep proof of insurance for exchanges and activities.
Phase 6. Taxes, Benefits, Name Changes
Step 16. Tax filing status and credits
Clarify filing status for the current year. Decide who claims dependents and how you will handle child related credits. Track alimony tax treatment as applicable under current law. Keep receipts and statements.
Step 17. Benefits, COBRA, and coverage updates
If you lose employer coverage, review COBRA or marketplace options. Update beneficiaries with your employer. Review HSA and FSA balances and rules. National information on coverage is available at HealthCare.gov.
Step 18. Name change and ID updates
If you choose a name change, update Social Security, DMV, passport, bank, insurance, and professional licenses. Carry a certified copy of your court order during updates to speed processing.
Phase 7. Court, Mediation, Settlement
Step 19. Mediation prep and negotiation plan
Summarize your facts on one page. Attach an asset and debt sheet, a parenting plan, and a realistic settlement range. Decide what you will trade for what you need. Bring draft orders so agreements become real quickly.
Step 20. Trial readiness checklist
- Chronology of key events with citations to exhibits
- Exhibit list with page counts and highlights
- Witness list with direct questions and expected answers
- Opening and closing outlines focused on requested relief
Step 21. Final order, compliance, and follow through
Verify all exhibits are attached. Calendar deadlines for QDRO, title transfers, debt payoffs, and parenting transitions. Track compliance in Divorce OS so nothing slips.
Downloadable Templates
Master planning sheet
One page visual roadmap to keep the case moving.
Asset and debt spreadsheet
Standard columns for values, owners, and dates to simplify negotiation.
Parenting plan builder
Create schedules and rules in minutes and bring them to mediation.
Communication guide
Send concise, neutral messages that reduce conflict and protect the record.
Timeline and Cost Table
| Phase | Typical Timeline | Main Outputs | How it Lowers Cost |
|---|---|---|---|
| Decide and Prepare | 1 to 2 weeks | Goals, safety plan, support team | Prevents scattered actions and rework |
| Financial Foundation | 2 to 3 weeks | Inventory, budget, clean accounts | Reduces discovery disputes and delays |
| Legal Process | 2 to 6 weeks | Core documents, e filing, service | Smoother court path and fewer continuances |
| Kids and Support | 2 to 4 weeks | Parenting plan, temporary orders | Stability for children and fewer emergency motions |
| Property and Retirement | 2 to 6 weeks | Valuations, QDRO draft, insurance updates | Prevents post decree fixes and protects benefits |
| Taxes and Benefits | 1 to 2 weeks | Filing choices, credits, coverage | Avoids costly surprises after decree |
| Mediation and Settlement | 1 to 4 weeks | Term sheet, draft orders | Shortens attorney time and court time |
| Post Decree | 1 to 8 weeks | Transfers, compliance, audits | Ensures the deal you made becomes real |
Take Control With Splitifi
Run this divorce checklist inside Splitifi. Keep evidence organized, build a parenting plan, and track deadlines so progress never stalls.
FAQ: Divorce Checklist
What is a divorce checklist and why do I need one
A divorce checklist is a step by step plan for what to do before and after filing. It helps you avoid missed documents, slowdowns, and extra costs while protecting children and finances.
How early should I start using a divorce checklist
Start as soon as separation is possible. Early work on safety, accounts, and documents shortens the case and reduces stress.
Can a divorce checklist help in mediation
Yes. Organized inventory, a parenting plan, and a clean settlement range help mediation close faster with fewer sessions.
What documents belong in my divorce checklist binder
Tax returns, pay stubs, bank and credit card statements, retirement plan documents, deeds, titles, insurance policies, and any agreements related to children or property.
Does a divorce checklist work for uncontested cases
Yes. Uncontested cases rely on the same preparation. The difference is speed and reduced conflict when both sides stay organized.
